Horrorible Review: “The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra”

The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra movie poster

The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra

CFR’s favorite movie of ALL TIME.* The looks I got when I took it to her house were so fiery, so passionate, it warmed my heart to provide such quality entertainment.  Or maybe that was fury.***

The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra is a TERRIBLE movie.  The black and white is washed out and sometimes the focus pull is off, the writing is stiff and moronic and simple-minded, the acting is stiff and moronic and simple-minded, the special effects are obvious and cheap and simple-minded, the music is literally store bought from a museum, and the plot is singularly stupid.

It’s brilliant, is what it is, because the whole thing is done badly on purpose.  I’ve never seen a more slickly produced piece of crud that will have you falling out of your seat with stunned laughter.  Stunned because you’ll be laughing at the most ridiculous jokes, bad scenery or actors saying lines they couldn’t possibly be saying with a straight face, like, “Together you and I will rule the world together.”

Be sure to play the drinking game, which is a drink for every time someone says “science” (or scientist, etc.).  You could also get sloppy drunk with the alternate phrases, “Hmmm”, “I wonder”, “Oh well”, and bonus shots for “I sleep now”, “always agree”, “rahwer”, and “tip tip tip tip tip tip tip”. If you’ve ever seen this movie, you’re laughing right now just reading that.

This pastiche of every 1950s science fiction film ever made follows a scientist who goes up to a secluded cabin with his wife so he can do science on a meteor full of the element atmospherium.  A mad scientist who wants to reanimate the fabled lost skeleton (fully articulated with strings obviously attached to the bolts and rivets) is also trying to get the atmospherium, and Krobar and his wife Lattice of the planet Marva (who arrive in a space ship model made of a spray painted toilet paper tube – I’m not kidding) need the atmospherium to fix their space ship to get home. Oh, and their mutant escaped so watch out for that.

Ludicrous shenanigans involving climbing stairs, eating food, soft funnels and skeleton shotgun weddings will keep you guessing, mostly at just how far down the rabbit hole writer, director and actor Larry Blamire will take you.  You will recognize some of the actors from tv roles that came after this movie, and every one of them is talented and dedicated to making Lost Skeleton as bad as possible. This is the sort of movie that begs to be watched at a movie party, especially if everyone has a drink in hand.

You must see this movie to fully appreciate its inspired badness and I highly recommend that you do so.  There is a sequel, The Lost Skeleton Returns Again and the haunted house thriller Dark and Stormy Night, also from the pen and camera of Blamire.  I’ve seen both of these and though they are funny, I don’t think he will ever match the brilliance of Lost Skeleton.

Just don’t take any of them to CFR’s house.

LINKS:

The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra – Official Trailer [HD]

Lost Skeleton of Cadavra (2004) random dance scene

Found! Only Footage From Silent LOST SKELETON OF CADAVRA

CFR: In Addition:

*Mildred is lucky I love her and value her friendship as much as I do.

** Holy Goodness! This has its own Website?!@?!?!?!?

*** It was fury. And disgust.

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