• OVERALL: Don’t bother

• POINTS: Music was fun. The explosions and explanations of them were cool too. Plus Rod Steiger does a beautiful Cuban accent. Also the costumes were great in showing the difference between the Anglos and the Cubans.

• PITFALLS: The movie could have been dramatic and suspenseful but it was melodramatic and silly. The scenery was beautiful – Miami is pretty – and the actors are buff and beautiful. But well, I think a better director would have made the movie better. In fact, it has the most embarrassing love scene I’ve ever witnessed. I felt so sorry for the actors. Actually I felt sorry for the actors when they weren’t in the sex scene. I felt sorry for all of them all the time. They did try.

• FEMALE CHARACTER(S): Sharon Stone is gorgeous. Absolutely beautiful. And sexy. And she would be sexier if she stopped trying. Seriously. Don’t try anymore Sharon, just be. Other than that the female character was there for looks and fantasy fulfillment for the men on the set. Which is too bad. I think Stone could really deliver.

• CULTURAL PITFALL(S): The heroine was there to look at.

• HIGH POINT(S): Well the movie ended.

• BECHDEL TEST (Website): I didn’t even bother (but I’m sure it’s a 0).

• IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0111255/

• OFFICIAL MOVIE WEBSITE:  Didn’t bother to look it up.

• DVD/BLU-RAY WORTHY: Oh goodness NO! We TiVo’d this and just watched it ’cause. Hubby loved living in Miami and the music was good.

•  LION PAW PRINTS:  0. ‘Nuff said.

Wow. This is my first bad review.